Month: February 2023

Need A Push?

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A man and his wife are awakened at 3 o’clock in the morning by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push.

“Not a chance,” says the husband, “it is three o’clock in the morning!” He slams the door and returns to bed.

“Who was that?” asked his wife.

“Just some drunk guy asking for a push,” he answers.

“Did you help him?” she asks.

“No, I did not, it is three in the morning and it is pouring outside!”

“Well, you have a short memory,” says his wife. “Can’t you remember about three months ago when we broke down and those two guys helped us? I think you should help him, and you should be ashamed of yourself!”

The man does as he’s told, gets dressed, and goes out into the pouring rain. He calls out into the dark,
“Hello, are you still there?”

“Yes,” comes back the answer.

“Do you still need a push?” calls out the husband.

“Yes, please!” comes the reply from the dark.

“Where are you?” asks the husband.

Replies the drunk – “Over here on the swing!”

How To Call The Police!

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George Phillips of Meridian, Mississippi was going up to bed when his wife told him that he’d left the light on in the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom window.

George opened the back door to go turn off the light but saw that there were people in the shed stealing things.

He phoned the police, who asked “Is someone in your house?” and he said “no”. Then they said that all patrols were busy, and that he should simply lock his door and an officer would be along when available.

George said, “Ok,” hung up, counted to 30, and phoned the police again.

“Hello, I just called you a few seconds ago because there were people in my shed. Well, you don’t have to worry about them now cause I’ve just shot them all.” Then he hung up.

Within five minutes three police cars, an Armed Response unit, and an ambulance showed up at the Phillips residence and caught the burglars red-handed.

One of the Policemen said to George: “I thought you said that you’d shot them!”

George said, “I thought you said there was nobody available!

The Pharmacist

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A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, right up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, “I would like to buy some cyanide.”

The pharmacist asked, “Why in the world do you need cyanide?”

The lady replied, “I need it to poison my husband.”

The pharmacist’s eyes got big and he exclaimed, “Lord have mercy! I can’t give you cyanide to kill your husband! That’s against the law! I’ll lose my license! They’ll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!”

The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist’s wife.

The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, “Well now. That’s different. You didn’t tell me you had a prescription. “

Do NOT try this at home! LOL!

A New Store:

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Husbands for SALE

A store that sells new husbands has just opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates:

You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights.

The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:

Floor 1 – These men Have Jobs. She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:

Floor 2 – These men Have Jobs and Love Kids. “That’s nice”, she thinks, “but I want more.” So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:

Floor 3 – These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking. “Wow,” she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going. She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 4 – These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop Dead Good Looking and Help With Housework. “Oh, mercy me!” she exclaims, “I can hardly stand it! “Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 5 – These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop Dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak. She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:

Floor 6 – You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.

PLEASE NOTE:

To avoid gender bias charges, the store’s owner opened a

New Wives store just across the street.

The first floor has wives that love sex.

The second floor has wives that love sex and have money.

The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited.

Please Help I Need Your Opinion

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If it’s not too much to ask, I’d really like an honest opinion.

About Web Sights

Yes I know I’m here on WordPress .. but what other might you use for other venues?

Blogger? GoDaddy? I’m not even sure of what all is out here. Or do you put all your eggs into one basket … here (or elsewhere).

I’m torn, because of cost, but I have so many poems that I’d really like to showcase, as there is a book with a title in the library of congress with Copyright… but I’ll probably never get it fully proofed as it should, so one or two at a time will work.

Creative ART & my Hand-Painted glass. Yes, I guess I’ve had my hands in a few things throughout the years with so many interruptions… I just need to try and focus on one or two and show what I’m capable of!

That’s why my question.

And with WordPress… It’s a pain sometimes, trying as now to compose and it keeps moving words into other parts as it pleases! I also like the poetry to be displayed as I wrote them.. NOT everything is up and down left to right ..and I want it to be shown as I wrote them and intended for them to be. AND different fonts are always a way of expression with me.

I do hope that someone will read, understand this and help me out. My time is precious as I’m a caregiver of my Mother who will be 95 in April. So my time, is when I can I want to grab an easy place to Hang My Hat!

Thank You for your time.

Decisions

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Having a difficult time trying to figure out and design another ‘site’ for my art creations and my ‘stuff’.

Apophysis, Digital, Fractal art designs that are incredibly fun and fascinating. Along with a few other applications derived from the same premise. design with fractals… Some I’ve tried and way beyond my mind with so many other things that arose, my mind was not into it… but a couple are indeed worth trying.

And NOW, there has come the AI creations, that Ifind so intriguing and unique, but sometimes my mind goes into dump mode and there’s nothing there with the visual that so many have. BUT I have created some that I’m thrilled with.

So WHERE do I go and what do I do? STAY here or go to another(s) sight?

My Poetry, I also have listed at BLOGGER, one of the book parts that I’ve sat on for many years. I Really Need to start showcasing them again!

AND least but not forgotten, is the hand painted glass that I cannot do at the moment, but I would like to share what I created and the pieces I still have within my arsenal!

HELP!.. Now there are three parts to my book of poetry, and think best to separate out.

The designs of fractal creations … so many sections!

My glass .just one sight will do!

Helpful suggestion are so welcome!

My Birthday

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I celebrated a birthday today.

Turned an age I wasn’t sure I’d ever see… but I’m here.

But today • I was scared • almost fell face first while going back to the car at CVS on University… I would have fallen face first.
How I did not fall • was God’s hand.

I’m thankful and grateful that I’m not in the hospital!

It really shook me to my core.

Thankful for every day . Even those that don’t go as we’d hope.

Have a blessed day ahead.
I Will .

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My Birthday

Changing of Times

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Daddy’s Story Through My Eyes

It has been quite some time since I’ve put anything on ‘paper’ but I’m going to give this a try, once again.

So much has changed in these last few years, where to begin.

My DADDY began having issues and neither Mother nor myself recognized what was happening, after all he was up in years! So no need to worry, right? Wrong. Daddy was in the stages of Alzheimer’s. The later stage I guess you’d call it. That began in 2013 when we really noticed, but little did we know it has been approaching for some time.

The SIGNS of this horrible disease, was and still is too little. The signs were there, if only we had known. Times when Mother would have to remember ow they drove to a place so she could help daddy get them back out. That was a sign. But just old age… NOT. It was a subtle sign. Ignored. Not knowing how to write a check or making sure the numbers were correct. I remember vividly one afternoon. Daddy always cut his yard and mine (I live across the street) and loved doing it, as it kept him active & as a young man and Daddy, he had done ‘a many a one’ to help support his family, so he knew how to cut yards & keep them up etc. This one day, I called mom and asked he if Daddy felt OK… why she asked… because he’s cutting the yard (backyard which is very small) all wrong. He’s cutting & throwing the grass into the flower beds that has just been mulched. She say, no… not that she knew of, so we both just figured it was an ‘Off’ day, once again, due to ‘age’. That’s when we began paying a little more and closer attention to the actions and saw that something was definitely wrong. Perhaps he had cancer again, or his heart needed attention again.

In Apr.il of 2013 we tricked daddy going for a ride and took him to the ER

….Back to writing this ….

That was the beginning of a discovery we knew nothing about and still there is little known things to alert the loved ones.

What’s ahead is devastating. For everyone, including the loved one your watching go down hill with no way to stop it, no way to tell them and understand that you’ll be there for them and you’ll love them forever and always.

Alzheimer’s Disease……

DADDY. Back to our story of Daddy….

WELL, I suppose this will have to wait until another time .yet again. but for now, perhaps someone, if only me will read and understand the trial and tribulations that have occurred over the last several years .. and that does not begin to touch the surface of my mother and I dealing with that and the other issues that tagged along and others that arose!

So until another post.another day. stay well.

One More Day

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This is the last day of my life with the age of 70!

It’s been a tumble few years, but all in all, grateful for the times I’ve had and shared

with my Mother who will turn 95 in April. She is a true tough cookie, as the old saying goes! She and I together we’ve tried to conquer the hurdles that have come our way.

So this last day of being 70 … I’m so grateful for this time. Tomorrow is not promised, but praying that the dayand weeks and months ahead will shine light on mother and I!

Until later, may your day be one of blessings.

We’ll meet again.

Down to the Wire

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Well, it’s coming down to the wire! In a few days I’ll pass another year of aging.

This year past and the three before it, have been trying, but I’m grateful to still be here and to have beautiful mom who will have milestone of her own birthday in April …

Times tough. But we keep going. WordPress,please bear with me as my funds are just about null before the SS kicks in and hopefully my domain will not go bye-bye!

I really don’t know when my funds have been this low. I’ve have issues before, just like so many have, but this is beyond what I’ve ever experienced.

So to all of you, hang in there, is about all I can say. Right NOW!

It is February after all!